Divorce is a huge decision, and this is especially true if there are children involved. They often don't understand why the separation is happening, and it's not uncommon for them to somehow feel they're to blame. There are five things parents should not do during their divorce case in order to best protect the children.
- Experience Counts
Never cut corners when it comes to hiring a divorce attorney. Practice makes perfect, and those who have already represented various other clients are better prepared to deal with the unique circumstances you are facing.
- Don't Make Negative Comments
Although your spouse may have done something unforgivable in your eyes, it's crucial to understand their transgressions were not against the children. Therefore, you should never make negative or derogatory comments about them when within earshot of the kids. This only puts them in an awkward position and upsets them.
- Don't Seek Emotional Support From Your Kids
Your job as a parent is to protect your children. The divorce is difficult on everyone involved, and you're there to offer them support. When you need a shoulder to cry on, seek out help from a friend or even a professional if necessary.
- Don't Ignore the Subject
Divorce certainly impacts the children of that marriage, and kids have a number of ways of expressing the inner conflict they're certainly going through. Make sure to keep a watchful eye to ensure you are able to seek help when necessary. Some common problems that can arise include lack of sleep, decrease in physical activity, and poor eating habits. Find a quiet time without electronics or other distractions to encourage them to share their feelings.
- Don't Encourage a Replacement
If there's someone else who will be replacing your spouse in your life, don't try to force this replacement on the children. You can never replace their parents, and their acceptance of the new person in your life must be earned.
Best for All
Whatever the reason for your decision to divorce, it was likely made in the best interest of all involved. By following these five tips, you can better help your children get through the process and continue on being young while having as little negative impact as possible on their future views on marriage and family.